GRAPEFRUIT JUICYFRUIT.

Such a week. Its only Wednesday but it’s been an emotional roller coaster. Why… only My Lord has the answers. Yesterday they called me into the office and informed me that after next Thursday, I am no longer employed at National. I have been struggling with my computerized accounting the entire term. We had to learn both QuickBooks and Sage50. Both books have 15 chapters and we only have 5 weeks to complete them. I’m no good with math & computers. Ok, I am alright with math, as long as its pencil and paper. I am, right now, getting a B+ in Business math. No computers/calculators/phones allowed. Its scratch paper and brain power, and with that, I seem to be doing alright. ++++++==========++++++++------------=========+++++++++++ I thought it was going to be harder today, you know. Facing my classmates when they all know I am failing that class, and working with my peers that know next Thursday is my last day. I was very worried about it, but, here I am. The class is over. The teacher knows that I have lost my job, and I have shared it with my friends, so there were no surprises and no whispering. I’m ashamed privately that I failed a class, but I am not ashamed if people know. It’s a personal thing that my feelings, although I have them, I am not worried what anyone but my teachers think about me. Is that wrong? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~``` I wonder what the holidays will bring. I am afraid. I worry about everything. I worry about my friend John and his mom. I am worried about my niece. I volunteered to take the baby if push comes to shove. I could really enjoy that. The thought of …. Well brings a twee bit of excitement with it too. I am expecting a small stipend from OCOG, which comes from the Ohio casinos, next week and I have my tree picked out at Target and some pretty lights too. I think/hope Phoebe being older will leave it alone… but, I doubt it. She is still feisty and fights Grace on a regular basis. So… I will not expect it to stay up long. But the living room is done in such a way that I have an entire wall for a tree. Gifts will be iffy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I cannot wait to go home tonight. I don’t have any homework to even think about tonight, so I foresee pjs and a little TV and some quality cuddle time with my kids. Maybe I’ll make some pasta for my lunch tomorrow. I cannot wait til Friday afternoon. I actually, even though I am losing my job after next Thursday, can’t wait until NEXT Friday after my final. A week off!!!!! Except for holiday baking, I have no intention of leaving the house much. Hopefully, if his mom is okay, and her caregiver is available, I’ll be able to have dinner or a movie with my friend John.  Well, I am going to go and finish studying my OS. Finals next week. One more term. Lord, please give me strength and wisdom. 