319pm. Tuesday. Yay.

Ten Thought Tuesdays

1. One of my thoughts is my attitude. I confided in a loved one last night that I was really in shock about how I am handling my moms death, and he said "You have lost something constant...whether good or bad, its constant." Did you ever just have that one person in your life, or not in your life, that you can always turn to for comfort. Thank you.
2. Its so funny the people that come into our lives at just the right time.
3. I was sitting back yesterday and came to realize that when people say "its all in God's timing", that actually, as I look back, I can see ( through human eyes) that God has been with me every step of the way. I was a bad girl, but even through all of my bad shit, my hair issues, my ''issues'' that I still deal with every day, He was there. I never have been arrested, I have never been in REAL trouble, and when trouble found me, God protected me.  I am not sure why things go to the point that they did with my first husband. I swear the first 12-16 years were really wonderful. It was hard, at times, with all the kids, and when he got sick, (and when he got really sick, you cannot believe how He took care of us!), but there was His plan. I think we messed that up our own selves.  When I lived alone, God was good to me and I was so not good to Him. But, He loved me. He let the people come into my life and leave it and I never understood but I trusted Him. Then there was Gary. I thought I wasn't really sure why God brought me Gary, but when I married my second husband, I really realized why Gary had been in my life. I was not ever a touchy feely kind of gal, and Gary was not a sexual interest to me, but one day we were at the theater, and something happened between us, and when we left the movie he commented on how amazing I made him feel. Like a 'breakthrough' in our relationship. Again, nothing sexual!!. I think we split up not long after that. We got back together again for awhile, but it just wasn't there, but I did start doing the things he told me made him feel special. So, when I met my second husband, I think I took what I learned from Gary and made it work. I think I was a good wife. I think I took what I learned and made a great relationship with that. But... I kind of got back from him, the person I used to be. Honestly, when they tell you that they don't know how to be affectionate, don't ever think you are going to change that. I think people who say that, aren't really that into you. They don't really WANT TO give that affection. I hear that it was only me that there was no affection shown. Lessons learned. ANYWHO, that marriage didn't pan out either, but there were several things that The Lord pulled me through and pushed me over the top with. Today I am working on my Associates Degree, starting my own business, and relearning how to make it on my own. Thank you Lord, and thank you to all of you who have been part of my life and influence and sway my decisions. I'm happy.
4. I cannot WAIT for this term to be over. Studying will be so much more intense now that my responsibility load is a little lighter. Again. the plan.
5. 401. Oh thank you. 59 minutes.
6. I am so hungry. I had a blowme sandwich, a banana and a yogurt for lunch. Oh and 50 gallons of water. Now I am water full and getting a bit hungry. I think I need some crabcakes. Yummy.

8. I wish I could HTML this image into my HOMEWORK!!

9. I am so glad we have a week off in 2 weeks. I wish I could take that week to go to my cousins, but I have to get my life in order in that week. And my brother is having surgery.  I wonder if my family would hate me if I took my vaca over Thanksgiving break...

10. Next pay, I am buying a tanning package. I'm due!!!